Naughty parents. Oh, and Happy Birthday.

Once upon a time, there was a little fella named Russ. He was a spitfire of a boy who found trouble at every turn. From shooting bullets in his sister's underwear (did you know they weren't supposed to go through silk?) to painting armadillos (have any idea how funny they look when they're yellow striped and running away) he has was always finding a way to get in trouble. As he grew up his pranks were still plentiful and his sense of humour neverending. Yesterday marked that "little fella's" 78th birthday. The birthday prank this year (that wasn't funny) needs a little set up:

Picture this. We agree to meet at his favorite restaurant for dinner, Red Lobster. Now, prankster Dad has a cell phone that he seldom uses while driving... it can be a little too much to handle and keep up with "all the driving idiots in the Twin Cities." Assuming his always-on-time-and-sometimes-early daughter was late, he called from the parking lot to confirm his arrival. What he didn't know is that I was already in a booth waiting for him. So the conversation goes like this (with neither knowing exactly where the other is):

Ring. Ring.
Me: "Hello?"
Dad: "Hey there, it's me!"
Me: "Where are you?" (me)
Dad: "Oh, I'm getting close to the restaurant.. where are you?"
Me: "You're talking on the phone while driving? What gives? I'm at the restaurant"
Dad: "Ok, I'll be there in a minute... oh... wait! Oh no! There's a train. Oh no, I'm stuck on the railroad tracks!!!"

- - - > S U P E R L O U D H O N K I N G H O R N < - - - -

Suddenly I can't breathe. The phone is quiet and I'm FREAKING OUT. My Dad was just run over by a train!!

Me: "Dad! Dad! Are you there? Are you ok???"
Him: (Laughing uncontrollably) "Yes, I've just finished honking my horn. I'll be right in- I've been in the parking lot the whole time."

Ugh. Who says kids give their parents grey hair?